Just Thinking..

So tonight has been one of those nights where I seem to be lost in thought..to be honest ive been that way for the last week or so..not that its bad to be lost in thought its just kinda counter productive to my artistic side..I have a hard time focusing on being creative when the analytical side of my brain wont shut up..What have I been thinking about? Well to be honest any number of topics ranging the mundane to the simply weird..take for example how I was earlier thinking about how strange it is that we read left to right..why is that? is it more effiecent thatn right to left or why dont we read vertically? Now normally I welcome these types of thoughts since they are like small breezes that seem to only last as quickly as they came. The other trickier ones are when I reflect inwards. Thinking about oneself and your place in the world is something that Im sure everyone has done at least once in their life and its one of those things that can really define who you are as a person or who you arent, I guess it just depends on your perspective. Anyways Im at a Strange place right now, and granted most of it is probably due to the fact that in nine short days I am going to be a quarter of a century old. Now I know thats still young by alot of people standards and I would tend to agree with them. Its not the age that bothers me, no its the general lack of accomplishment that seems to weigh heaviest on me. Im gonna be perfectly honest with anyone who might be reading this ( which isnt many my blogs named what it is for a reason haha) that it is mostly my own fault. I guess I havent always been the hardest worker in life, I tend to take things easy because thats where im comfortable its what ive been doing since i was a kid being the class clown was always easier than being the nerd. It was all about making people laugh before they laughed at me. Looking back though that wasnt probably the way to go. I guess my whole point of this thought process is that Im looking at being twenty five with no real job and I dont really know where or what im gonna do, and to be honest thats really scary. I mean Its the one aspect in my life right now that I would change everything else is perfect, I have a wonderful girlfriend who means the world to me, who inspires me and makes me wanna be a better person. I cannot put into words how much she means to me and how all I want is to see her beautiful smile and to just be with her. I also have a great group of friends, people who dont judge me for who I am, and they truly love me. Some of them I dont get to see as often as id like but thats ok. Having good friends means alot to someone like me. I never grew up with that. Thinking about all of them makes me realize how I wanna make them proud of me. Maybe im crazy, I know I have issues probably to many to list here in this blog post but the more I think about the more I want to inspire people. This whole post was never meant to be negative its really more a vehicle for myself to get alot of what im thinking out and to be truly honest with myself. There is only one thing I ask anyone who might read this, just take a moment and think about your life, think about what youve done, who you are, who you want to be and be honest with yourself. I also wanted to say thank you to everyone who has ever inspired me. Its amazing how one small thing can have an affect on you. There are too many people to list but heres to the good memories of our past and hers also to making new ones. Like I said Ive been thinking alot and just writing this has seemed to help. I still am unsure about what I am going to do or what path to take but im ok with that. As long as I have those that are important to I can figure it out..the way I see it maybe everything is just a matter of timing. Anyways thats probably enough of my ramblings for now hopefully the journey into my mind didnt give you any mental scars or anything...

love peace and chicken grease

- chris